The Station

Brie (00:01)
Hey there and welcome to Salon Swagger, make bank run the show, ditch the chair. This is the podcast where we dive into the ups downs and everything in between when it comes to running a salon or spa. I'm Brie and as always, I'm here with Chandra C. Hey girl.

Chandra (00:14)
Hello, hello there.

Brie (00:16)
Well, today we are tackling a big one, empowerment over entitlement, standing firm against your team's demands. The reality is running a salon, running a spa, it isn't just about keeping the books full. It's not about nailing your marketing. It's about managing, leading and growing people. And that right there, that's where things can get really messy, unfortunately. We all want to create a team culture where our staff feels valued.

They feel appreciated. They feel supported. But what happens when their wants turn into demands? When that entitlement just creeps in and suddenly it feels like you are no longer in control of your own business. So if you've ever felt like a hostage in your business, walking on eggshells, afraid to say no, terrified to set boundaries because you don't want to upset your team, stick around because this episode is for you. The reality is,

standing firm against the entitlement, that doesn't make you the bad guy. It makes you a business owner. It's about stepping into your role as a leader and creating a culture that runs on empowerment, not fear. So today we are going to break down exactly how you can do that, how to set clear boundaries, how to lead with confidence, and how to make sure your business is fully yours, not a business that is dictated by the loudest voices in the room.

Nothing like that. So let's jump right in because we have some great information to share with you guys. All right, Chandra, you know the common struggles. Salon and Spa owners, they have one of the most unique leadership dynamics out there, in my opinion. It's really so different than most businesses because for the majority of them, their teams, they work with them on the floor every single day, but they also work for them.

It can be really hard to determine where one line begins and the other one ends. In fact, that line can get really blurry, really fast. So let's throw out a few ways that entitlement can sneak into a salon or spa really quickly. Number one is close relationships. When your team feels more like friends or family boundaries, they almost always get crossed. Miscommunication. If expectations are not crystal clear, people start just assuming that they can make their own rules.

And then I think industry pressure is one too. In this industry, it's become almost like it's ingrained in our brains that we have to keep stylists happy at all costs to avoid turnover. But at what expense? Here's the thing, and I know I said this earlier, but you would be amazed at the amount of salon and spa owners that just feel like they are being held hostage by their employees. Chandra and I talk to them every day.

They go around walking on those eggshells. They don't enforce their policies. They don't raise their standards. They're terrified to say, nope, can't do that. Nope, not today. Because they don't want to lose people. They don't want to lose their team. It's like their business is no longer theirs. It belongs to whoever's yelling the loudest, whoever threatens to leave, whoever refuses to follow the rules. That's the new owner of the business. Please guys, hear us when we say this. Your business is not a prison.

and you are not a hostage. You don't have to beg your team to stay. You don't have to compromise your values or your vision just to keep people happy. And you definitely don't have to sacrifice your sanity in order to avoid conflict. It should be this way, your salon, your rules. Now, I'm not saying to be some power hungry tyrant that is only out for themselves, but you have to stand true to who you are.

what you believe in, what your vision and what your values are. If you really want to build a legacy and a thriving profitable business, we have to talk about the ways that you can take your power back. Chandra, why do you think entitlement sneaks into salons and spas so easily?

Chandra (04:22)
think it's mostly fear from the owner. They are afraid to put that line in the sand, right? Like they're scared that they're going to leave. They're scared their whole other team is going to get upset if they don't let somebody get away with what they want. And I think that it seeps right in. then, I mean, that's the biggest culture killer right there is not having that boundary and that line in the sand as to who's kind of in charge. Even though you don't want to walk around being the tyrant, you're still in charge.

Brie (04:50)
I think the dynamic because so many of us, like I just said, we are working beside our team every single day. So they get this misperception almost that we are just a fellow employee, right? We're a friend, we're a fellow employee, we're a coworker instead of actually being the leader. And I think this is where salon and spa owners have to have that mindset shift. have to change what they're doing. Have you seen salon owners struggle with

feeling like they are held hostage by their team.

Chandra (05:21)
all of them almost, at least at some point in their ownership journey, right? Like everybody feels like that at some point when you're trying to come into your own ownership leadership manager. I think that that's the hardest part is getting over that.

Brie (05:37)
Yeah, 100%. How do you think the pressure to keep stylists happy at all costs will backfire on salon and spa owners if they don't stop it?

Chandra (05:48)
Well, you won't be the owner. Like you kind of said, like your team is going to be the one that's the owner, technically, the one that's in charge, the one that's creating your culture, the one that's driving how your business is functioning. And you lose all control over everything you were trying to build.

Brie (06:05)
Yeah, definitely. I think for the sake of this episode, let's kind of break down the difference in empowerment and entitlement just so people understand. Empowerment is about giving your team the tools that they need to succeed. It's about growth. It's about accountability. It's about ownership. When you empower your team, you're creating this environment where they can step up, where they can take initiative, where they can truly earn the benefits that they receive.

Entitlement on the other hand, this is when people expect things like rewards without putting in any effort. It's when they believe that they deserve special treatment just for showing up to do their job. It's when they demand more without working for it. It's when there is no gratitude and no accountability. As a leader of your business, your job is not to cater to your team's every request.

It's to create strong structured environment where employees know what's expected and they feel supported while working towards their own success. Chandra, how would you define the difference between empowerment and entitlement if you were coaching a salon owner right now?

Chandra (07:20)
Yeah, I mean, I think pretty close to what you just said. think it is that difference of building them up, empowering them, coaching them to be successful, but not catering to that entitlement side. Like if you give them rewards all the time, no matter what, then that's what they're going to expect. And if that's what a lot of owners are doing when we start coaching them is we find out they've been just giving them everything the whole time without putting that firm structure in there first.

So then they just expect that all the time. And I think that's a really big thing when I'm coaching new people is when you find that out that they just, but if I take it away, now they're all going to get upset. And it's like, there's, there has to be some give and take. I always feel like there has to be give and take on both sides. So if they're just take, take, taking, and you're just give, give, giving, then that's never gonna work.

Brie (08:11)
What do you think is the biggest thing that actually causes entitlement in the first place? Do you think it stems from leadership? Do you think it stems from maybe the industry norms that we know of? Or do you think it's something else?

Chandra (08:23)
I think it's a little bit of both of those things. I think it does stem from leadership because if you set that precedent up to begin with, that's the way everybody in your business is going to start to behave. I think that the industry does sort of foster people who sort of feel like they could do whatever they want no matter what, because there's so many different variations of business structures out there for salons and spas. But I do think a lot, the majority of it comes from leadership. think if you set that precedent, then.

That's what you're going to get back.

Brie (08:55)
Yeah. So let's talk about what to do when entitlement starts to creep into your business and into your culture. The answer is honestly really simple. You lead. You lead with clarity. You lead with confidence and a rock solid backbone. Rock solid backbone. Okay. So let's discuss five steps that you can take to combat entitlement that may help you if you're in this position. Number one, define your non-negotiables. Before you can stand firm,

You have to know what you stand for. What are you willing to accommodate and what is absolutely off the table for you? Example of this would be, are last minute schedule changes okay for your team? What about pay raises? What does that look like? Do you have clear policies around promotions and perks? If not, these are the things that you need to start creating. Number two is clear expectations. If you do not communicate your expectations upfront,

being the keyword upfront. Don't be shocked when people just assume that they can do what they want and make their own rules. You have to set those clear expectations. You need written agreements for things like your pay structure, scheduling, performance expectations. You have to keep everything black and white. There is no gray, there's no in-between. This way, when a conflict does arise, you aren't debating feelings, you are referring back to what has already been agreed upon.

Number three, lead with logic, not emotion. Salon and spa owners are notorious for this. When a team member comes to you with a demand, don't react emotionally. Don't do it. You have to stick to the facts. You have to stick to the numbers. You have to stick to the data. That's very, very important. If somebody's asking for a raise, instead of immediately just saying yes or no, break it down. What is their performance like? How are their retail sales?

What's their client retention rate? You need benchmarks and data so that you can make those decisions. Number four, do not be afraid to say no. Your business is not a democracy. Saying no doesn't make you a bad leader. It makes you a responsible one. It makes you a responsible one. Number five, offer solutions, not excuses. So instead of just shutting things down, find ways that you can coach and you can guide your team.

towards earning exactly what they're wanting. That's so important and salon owners don't do it enough. Chandra, which of these do you think is the most important and how do you think or which one do you think people should start with first?

Chandra (11:36)
I think creating your expectations and setting that up to where that way everyone knows for every single thing that happens in your business, every single request that you might get, whether it's time off or, you know, I want to change this or move an appointment or do something. Every single request that you get needs to have a process around it and how those things are going to be handled. Because if you start there, then they know exactly what the expectations are and it's easier for you to uphold those going forward instead of

feeling like, they're complaining or they're whining. I have to say yes to this. And it's like, no, this is the policy. This is what we follow. Now you know. That's the answer, right? So it makes it so much easier actually when those things are in place.

Brie (12:21)
Yeah, it really does. And I think your non-negotiables and your expectations have to go hand in hand. Your expectations that you're creating, those are non-negotiables. That's what your business stands on. I see so many, and I know you do too, because we talk to people every day. They have expectations, but there's always so much leeway in there. They just give and give and give the leeway until, like we both said earlier, the control is completely lost.

This is not about being a mean, controlling person. This is about you being a business owner, somebody who took every bit of the risk, somebody who is killing yourself every single day just to keep those doors open. And you have to keep that in mind and you have to create structure in order for that to keep happening. So once a salon owner kind of recognizes that entitlement has crept into their team, their culture,

What is the first step to really addressing it? What's the difference between being a strong leader and being too harsh when you're handling team demands, Chandra?

Chandra (13:27)
Well, I think if everything's gotten out of hand and now you have to go in and start reeling things back, it is challenging because they're not used to that. And they're not used to you sort of acting like the leader and maybe telling them no or giving them that structure. So I think the first thing you can do is really create those expectations and then start kind of filtering them to your team. Like, hey, you know, this is what we're going to start doing. This is why.

This is, know, don't throw a hundred thousand things at them at once, but start filtering it in and it slowly starts to take on a life of its own. And then they start to follow it. And then you start to get that control back instead of it running like a chaotic mess all the time.

Brie (14:07)
for sure, what are some key boundaries that you think maybe three or four that every salon owner should have in place to prevent entitlement from becoming a problem in the first place?

Chandra (14:18)
I think, you know, being close to your team is one thing, but not being overly close to where they think they can just walk all over you and that you're like their friend and it'll be fine and no big deal. think that's a big problem. And I think setting that boundary to where like, I'm your boss. I care about you. I want you to grow. want you to succeed. But you know, you have to have that sort of hard boundary there to where it's not like I'm just a doormat. I want you to succeed, but you can't walk all over me.

And I think that's, that's a big one. And I think just having people understanding like that, where that those boundaries are right. Like, yes, I'm here for you. And, but these are the expectations. And I think that's how you can start to instill that with your team. have a stylist just for a quick. Like example, she, I was doing her one-on-one the other day and she's really quiet and she kind of skates under the radar, but she follows all the rules. She's the best employee. She doesn't ever do anything wrong.

And she came into her one-on-one, she's like, everybody thinks that I just get away with everything. And I was like, what are you talking about? And we broke it down. It was a joke. She wasn't being serious, but sometimes they do, cause they're like, well, what do you talk about in your meeting? Cause she does everything right and she's quiet about it. And so they think she kind of gets away with stuff. And so it's kind of that boundary, right? Like she knows, everybody knows, but it's like, you have those people that, you know, it was like a joke. We talked about it. It was fun, but it wasn't crossing over that line to where it was like.

Well, you know you do have to follow the rules, right? Like you don't get away with things in here. And so that was just a quick example I thought I'd give.

Brie (15:54)
Yeah,

no, I love that. I think one of the best things that people can remember is it's okay to be friendly, but it's not okay to be friends. And that is one of the best pieces of advice. It's crazy, right? Because you see these millionaire business owners out there, billionaire business owners, and they can say a simple sentence like that, that can really just change everything in the way that you look at things. And that has stuck with me for a very, very long time.

Entitlement, it can't grow in places where accountability thrives. It just can't. If you want to prevent this from becoming maybe a pattern in your studio, you have to build a culture where effort is rewarded, not demands, not ultimatums, not threats. It's about effort. So let's talk about a few ways that you can build a culture of empowerment. Number one is to provide growth opportunities.

offer training, mentorship, career paths so that your team knows that they have a future in your studio, in your organization. So important. that, those things are so important. Reward effort, not those demands. So recognize performance, not the people who complain the loudest. This is something that salon and spa owners are notorious for. They don't pay attention to the people who are doing their job, who are doing the good things.

because there's so many other people out there making noise and causing issues. Create open communication, encourage feedback, but set boundaries around when and how these conversations are going to happen. Chandra just talked about her one-on-one. That is how the conversations need to take place. And then model accountability. Show up on time, follow through, hold yourself to the same exact standards that you expect of your team.

Chandra, what are the most effective ways to really reward effort and performance rather than just giving in to those demands?

Chandra (17:54)
I think having those key metrics that they have to hit and tracking those, coaching them through those, I think that's great way to reward them. If you're doing something specific and if you're trying to bring these rules into place, you know, sometimes you could even reward them for making sure that they're sticking to the rules and doing what they're supposed to be doing all the time. And I think

You know, anything that's metric based is probably the most important thing because then they know it's a give and take now, right? Like I'm giving, I'm trying, I'm pushing, I'm doing what I need to do. And on the other side of that, I get this incentive or I get this reward for, for doing that. And I don't think sometimes people get hung up on, well, I shouldn't reward them for doing their job. And it's like, well, no, but there are some things that you do want to give your team incentives for. Like you do want to push them to try harder and to.

be a good part of your business, of your culture. So when people are doing that, it is good to give them some sort of incentive.

Brie (18:53)
Yeah, 100%. And I think for salon and spa owners, a lot of us, know, we are in our mid ages or a little above. And so we've been around this industry for a very long time and it evolves so much. And I think as owners, we have to kind of evolve with it. And there are things that are expected now that weren't expected back in the day. And so we really have to think outside the box when we're doing those things.

Okay, I know you and I both are huge on career growth opportunities, like huge. And there's so many people that think this just means a level system, or it just means, you know what I mean, like jumping up in commission a little bit, but that's not what it's about. Talk about what role career growth plans play in kind of keeping entitlement at bay.

Chandra (19:47)
Yeah, because then everybody's focused on what their specific path is. And I think that they're concerned about making sure that they hit to the next promotion that they're eligible for if they do these numbers. It keeps everybody on track. It keeps them focused in line. They know that they're working towards something. It's not just about complaining in the back because they don't have some sort of career growth plan, right? Like they actually have a structure.

that they're motivated to try to hit. And I think that makes a huge difference in keeping everybody from that entitlement, because they know this is my career. This is where I want to go. This person is showing me the path. I'm going to follow that path and stay on the path and try to get there.

Brie (20:29)
One of the things that you and I talk about quite frequently is accountability. And I'm not talking about just for the team, I'm talking about for owners. And I think the reason that I find this so important is because I was an owner that didn't follow accountability quite often in my salon, right? I didn't model the accountability that I wanted my team to model. And when I learned how to do that and I shifted my mindset and I started doing things this way,

I feel like everything really started to change. It was a very, very hard step to take, but it was a great one. What do you think are some simple ways that salon owners can model accountability for their teams?

Chandra (21:10)
I think really following your own rules and sticking to your own rules. I just had a conversation with one of our team members the other day because she was asking me about dress code and we have fairly laxed dress code compared to what we used to have, but it's still professional. I still have to dress. And so we were just talking about it and I was like, I still feel like I'm breaking the rules when I run in on my day off and like workout clothes to like just grab something. Like if I walk over the threshold of that door, like I feel like I have to be.

ready for work, you know? And so I just like, even if I'm not working, it's still that feeling. And so I'm like, you guys need to feel that way too. Like you should want to feel like, you you can't walk in here unless you're ready to walk in here. But I just think, yeah, modeling your own rules, like stick to what you said. If you want them to do it, you got to do it. If you don't, if you don't care enough about your own rules, you can't expect your team to care about them, right?

Brie (22:05)
Why would they? I mean, why would they at all? Right? And it comes down to everything, your attitude, your dress code, like every single little thing that you are wanting, the respect factor, the not talking behind people's backs, all of it. You have to model all of it. There's a lot of times where entitlement, isn't just one team member that's causing the issue. It's a full on salon culture problem that has just infiltrated everything.

So let's talk about a few signs that will kind of tell you if maybe you have a deeper issue going on. If you are constantly building unreasonable demands from multiple people, huge red flag. Gossip intentions are running high, rampant all the time, red flag. No one, and I mean nobody is taking ownership of their performance, major red flag. If any of this is happening, you need to hit the reset button ASAP, like

Immediately call a team meeting reinforce your vision your values your expectations create and implement systems like performance reviews incentive programs clear communication channels because I promise you if you let entitlement run wild it will completely kill your culture 100 murder it Chandra at what point does entitlement stop being an individual issue and become a full-blown salon culture problem?

Chandra (23:32)
Well, I think when you let somebody get away with one thing over and over again, everybody sees that and then they start to want to get away with it. And then the next person starts to want to get away with it. And then before you know it, everybody's getting away with it and you just feel defeated and deflated because you're like, I said yes to that person. Now I got to say yes to this person. And then they're all entitled. And then now your culture is gone. So I think that's how it starts where all of a sudden it's like poof and it happens fast.

Brie (24:03)
It happens really, really fast. If you were talking to a salon owner right now, how would you tell them that they can regain control of their entire team when that entitlement mindset has set in? And what's the best way for them to reset expectations without creating resentment?

Chandra (24:23)
Yeah. And I think that's really hard. And I think that's where a lot of salon owners do kind of miss the mark sometimes when they start implementing structure, if they didn't have it or start kind of laying down the systems. But again, I think you have to start slowly. have to, like you said, call a team meeting, sort of reset some of those expectations, have one-on-one meetings after that meeting and make sure everybody understands they're on the same page and then slowly start trickling those things in. But I think you have to have a reason.

You know, like we want to be the best. So we're going to do X. We want to have this. We want to be this type of reputation. We want to be this type of salon. Cause you don't want to come in and just demand of everybody. Hey, you guys are all dressing terrible. Now everybody has to dress better, but there has to be something that can align them with that vision. Right? So it's like, if, if your vision is to have a really professional looking team,

then you have to get them aligned by that. Like we want to be luxury. We want to charge more. We want to have this. You guys want to make more money. Like turn it so that it's a benefit for them too, so that they see that and they understand why you're doing it. You're not trying to be mean. You're trying to elevate everyone and get them aligned with that. And I think that's the biggest way I would say to, you know, get your team back on track.

Brie (25:40)
Yeah, I think that's a great way to do it. I think that people need to look at their leadership style as well. If you have been so lenient in the past, it all boils down to you at the end of the day. You have created this monster, you've allowed this monster, and so you have to figure out how to change you in order to stop it. I think Chandra gave great advice. The one thing that I would say, make sure you have things ready before you just call that team meeting.

make sure you have those systems created, the expectations, all of that stuff in play. Because if you go into something and you don't know what you're talking about, you're just throwing words out there. Number one, you're not going to remember what you said. Number two, they are never going to remember what you said. So I think all of that is absolutely amazing. Look, salon owners, listen, your business should never feel like a hostage situation. It shouldn't. You do not owe anyone success.

at the expense of your own leadership, your own sanity, your own vision, your own values, entitlement has no place in a salon that is built for growth, for accountability and for opportunity. And that's what all of you guys should be wanting to create. When you learn to stand firm in your leadership, when you set those clear expectations, when you lead with empowerment instead of fear, you are going to create a culture that thrives, not one that just drains you.

every single day. But here's the thing, no one is going to step in and do this for you. Nobody. If you don't take control of your business, somebody else is going to. In fact, they probably already have. Whether it is an entitled team member, it's just the industry that gets to you or just the fear of upsetting people, something is always going to try to pull you away from the leader that you were meant to be. It's not the easiest job. It really isn't.

The only way to build a salon that actually works for you is to own your role, set the standard, and lead with confidence every single day. With that being said, Chandra, what last words of wisdom do you have for our listeners?

Chandra (27:52)
I think if you're in that situation right now where you're feeling held hostage, it's, you don't have to feel like that forever. And it doesn't have to be that way. Right? Like you've created the monster, just get it together, figure out what you want, figure out where you want to go, put it together, and then just start working with your team in a very good way. That's going to help get them aligned and, get them part of your mission and what you want to have in your business and start growing that better culture. Cause it does get better and it does get easier, but yeah.

to do it first.

Brie (28:23)
Definitely. We talk to people every day who are going through this. And one of the things that we hear when we are doing our strategy calls is that I don't think it'll ever change. I don't think it's too far gone. There's no way that it's ever going to happen. And I am here to, I'm here as proof of that. Chandra is as well. And everybody that we coach, it can change. It will change, but you have to step up, make the decision, make the investment and do the work.

If you guys are ready to take control of your salon and build a profitable, well-oiled machine, make sure that you are following us on all platforms. Chandra, how do our listeners connect with us?

Chandra (29:02)
Yeah, reach out to us on Instagram and Facebook at the Beauty Biz Agency. You can also check us out on TikTok at Beauty Biz Mentors, or you can shoot us an email at admin at thebeautybizagency.com.

Brie (29:15)
Absolutely, and visit our website, www.thebeautybizagency.com. We have some game changing resources, coaching options, and strategies to help you build a salon that works for you, not against you. That's what we've got for you. Now go out there, make bank, run the show, and ditch that chair. Until next time, keep slaying those business goals with a whole lot of swagger.